Intimacy is more than sex. Overall intimacy is essential in order for sexual intimacy to be fully enjoyed.

For sex to be truly intimate and meaningful it not only takes a great amount of love and attention outside the bedroom, but a great amount of emotional energy and work in the bedroom. Ironically, some people put more preparation into going out to dinner that into making love. If you do not have enough energy to participate in intimacy, let alone enjoy it, it is unreasonable to force it.

• Sex is easy. Intimacy though, is more involved.
  
  
• The central feature of intimacy is not emotional or physical. It is commitment.
  
  
• When intimacy is fully developed or restored, sexual difficulties tend to disappear.
  
  
• Emotional discomfort, whether fear or dissatisfaction, is usually a healthy indicator suggesting that something with you, your spouse and your relationship would benefit from some attention and improvement.
  
  
• Although problems with intimacy can affect feelings of self-worth, the fact of your inherent God-given worth remains unchanged.
  
  
• Sexual intimacy is like the frosting on a well-baked cake with all the essential ingredients in it. If an essential ingredient of the cake is missing sexual intimacy is unlikely to be satisfying.

A trusted, experienced therapist can help you and your partner learn the skills necessary to place more importance and attention on improving the overall relationship and thus naturally improve sexual intimacy.